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Killing Game 16.5: Dangan Dumbasses

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Killing Game 16.5: DanganDumbasses is a spin-off of Killing Game 16: Kansy's Game. It was a single session game meant to extrapolate on the fate of Hiroki Yoshimoto after escaping the Ultimate Luxury Cruise.

Disclaimer

Right off the bat, it should be addressed that this roleplay references many elements from a certain video game about teens on an island forced to kill one another. Many characters in this game are also taken directly from that game. To get around this, all characters from that game will only be addressed by aliases that describe them.

Backstory

Since only the final session of this RP was played, all previous events were written out in one big backstory block, separated into chapters.

Prologue

At the game's beginning, you all share the same memory. You were swimming in a pool of darkness, not lacking for air but still desperate to reach the surface. And the moment you did, you awoke lying on a beach.

At the beginning, there were fifteen of you there.

  • All Tits No Brains
  • Cock'n Cookin'
  • Dancing Bitch
  • Edgy Colored Swordswoman
  • Fellow Gamer
  • Freckled Photographer
  • Furry Breeder
  • Hyper
  • I CAN SEE THE FUTURE
  • Infant Gangster
  • Max's Favorite
  • Nevermind I Guess
  • Pink-Haired Landshark
  • SHIIITTTT!!!
  • The Creepy Luckster

You were all confused of course. After establishing that all of you were Ultimates, and that you had no memory of coming to that beach, it appeared.

A small rabbit, probably a foot tall, dressed in formalwear.

Its name was Kangoshusagi, but she insisted that everyone call her Kandy instead, as it sounded nicer. It's appearance was completely unreal. It was small and fluffy, almost like a stuffed animal. But it moved around too naturally, and did things that toys obviously shouldn't, like blink and breathe.

Kandy's explanation was sadly lacking. She simply informed you that you were all invited to enjoy a retreat on Unnamed Island, and that she would be your tour guide for the duration of the trip.

"It may seem a little scary at first, but I promise to keep you all safe. Try to get along with everyone, and form happy memories that will last forever!"

(Spoiler: She did not keep you all safe.)

Shortly after you all split up to explore the island, a sixteenth Ultimate washed up on the beach.

  • Hiroki Yoshimoto, the Ultimate Luckster

That created an obvious contradiction, since this group already had a Luckster. And while a few of the group had heard of The Creepy Luckster before, Hiroki Yoshimoto was a name that none of them were even remotely familiar with. As a result, Hiroki wound up as the most suspicious member of the group.

After everyone became acquainted with the environment and one another, Kandy called everyone to the park to explain more about their situation. Unfortunately, once they arrived, something unimaginable and frankly quite confusing to most happened.

Kandy had doubled, and was joined by another rabbit. Kansatsusagi, or Kansy for short. In stark contrast to Kandy, Kansy wanted everyone to participate in a killing game.

Kandy had been demoted from tour guide to chaperone. The force of this demotion brought her so much shame that she was powerless to fight back against the group's new sociopathic ruler.

To complete his announcement, Kansy revealed that there was a traitor among the group. He didn't say who, so it was a complete mystery. Truly it could have been anyone.

That was a lie, everyone just assumed it was Hiroki.

Chapter 1

At breakfast the next day, Pink-Haired Landshark and Dancing Bitch argue that they should tie him up and make him talk, starting a huge argument in the hotel restaurant. Nevermind I Guess is the one to put an end to it, and in doing so she is made to be the unofficial leader of the group.

The rest of the day passes without incident until evening, when Kansy comes forth with a motive. He puts on a comedy show with an uncooperative Kandy, and ends it with a rather stunning reveal.

"I'm the good bunny here, y'know? Kandy's the one you can't trust! After all, she stole three years worth of your memories!"

The suggestion was troubling, and it certainly motivated a few. Nevermind received an anonymous message that night warning that a murder would take place tomorrow.

To counter this, Nevermind announces a party. They decide to hold it in the old building, but first it needs to be cleaned. They pull straws to decide who the responsibility goes to, and Hiroki is chosen.

Everyone attends the party that evening. Nevermind isn't too thorough about confiscating items from everyone, but politely requests that nobody bring anything that could be used as a weapon just to be safe. Fellow Gamer volunteers to guard the door, and Kandy insists that she accompany the gamer. Everyone else spends the evening enjoying the party.

On their way out, the guests realize that both of their guards had vanished.

Fellow Gamer is found dead in the hotel restaurant. A knife sticking out of her chest.

The trial that follows reveals that the knife was surprisingly not what killed her. That was something The Creepy Luckster had stabbed into her after her death, because spoiler alert: The Creepy Luckster is a crazy ass motherfucker. No, the cause of death was poisoning.

And her killer? The group's leader, Nevermind I Guess.

The motive had been a plague within her mind, and the thought of what had happened to her country in the past three years drove her to take whatever means were required to return home at once.

Chapter 2

Good news for Hiroki, The Creepy Luckster being hyper susp makes him look less bad. Bad news for The Creepy Luckster though, as Pink-Haired Landshark and SHIIITTTT!!! tie him up and leave him in the old building.

There was a cruise on land on the second island. It needed a password to enter though, and had a scary looking gun near the input pad.

After a few days of taking in the new island and trying to mend the damage that losing the leader had on the group, a new motive is provided. An arcade cabinet was placed on the central island, and a special prize was promised to the first person to get the true ending.

The game's story was of two women trapped in a room, both agreeing not to betray one another. They made that assurance every hour, as time kept going on. No matter how much they explored however, no exit revealed itself. It seemed to end on the uncertain question of whether or not they would escape, but entering a basic cheat code revealed a hidden ending. During the night, one of the women cut the other's arm off, and placed it into a bin. After she did so, the door opened up, and she was able to leave. In the final scene the betrayed woman stumbled out of the room, running into her male friend soon afterwards. He swears revenge in her name, and the game truly ends.

A few people played it, and fewer saw the true ending. Even those who did reach the end were confused as to what the motive actually meant.

But the right people must have seen it, as Infant Gangster is killed the very next day, found dead in the beach house.

After an arduous trial, the truth of the matter is revealed. The person to beat the game first and receive the prize was Infant Gangster. The prize he received was a folder of photographs, one of which showed Edgy Colored Swordswoman and Max's Favorite sitting in the same room shown in the game, and another showed Edgy Colored with a bloody nub where her right arm should have been. Obviously these images didn't mesh with reality, but they were still concerning. Knowing that other people had played the game from conversations at breakfast, he decided to talk to Max's Favorite about it.

On Infant Gangster's recommendation, Max's Favorite played the game herself so that she'd know what he wanted to talk about. It left her horrified. Infant Gangster's talent scared her, so she brought a baseball bat to the beach house before they were set to meet up.

When Infant Gangster came, and showed Max's Favorite the photos he'd won, she was fully convinced she was about to die. She took the bat and swung it at the boy's head, cracking his skull.

Chapter 3

Sadness Sickness.

Actually, a lot happened first. There was a new island, Hyper put on a concert, Hyper revealed herself to have the weirdest fucking taste in music ever, and the show got canceled when Kandy burst in to reveal that All Tits No Brains was fighting Kansy.

Everyone rushed out to check on the Gymnast, prepared for the worst. What they probably weren't prepared for, was All Tits to actually be winning. Yeah, apparently Kansy's fucking weak. He's a rabbit. Go figure.

Before All Tits can land the finishing blow though, Kansy reveals that he plays cheap. He casts Kamikaze, killing himself but totally wrecking All Tits.

Kansy apparently had spares though! Very much unlike All Tits, who was left nearly dead. Thankfully, Kandy is able to convince Kansy to give her some medical assistance, and she's whisked away for basically the remainder of the chapter.

Okay, now Sadness Sickness.

The first three cases of it come from Hyper, Hiroki, and SHIIITTTT!!!. Hyper becomes completely subservient, Hiroki becomes annoyingly chipper about everything, and SHIIITTTT!!! acts like a lazy slob.

The Ultimates try to get a quarantine going in the newly acquired hospital, but unfortunately they were down the only trained medical professional after the last trial, so their attempt is a bit shoddy. Freckled Photographer, The Creepy Luckster, and Furry Breeder take shifts watching over patients, and two of them are infected by the end of the first day.

Freckled starts acting flirtatious with every man she sees, and cold towards women, while Furry behaves... terrifyingly normally. Both of them leave the hospital, and spread the disease further onto the other Ultimates. Soon enough, nearly everyone has it, and it's only a matter of time before the fever kills someone.

And then, quite suddenly, it's all cured. Probably because there was a murder.

Two for one even! Pink-Haired Landshark and I CAN SEE THE FUTURE are both found dead in the music venue with a funny name.

Everyone is shocked to learn that Hyper was the killer, Hyper included. Less surprising was the reveal that The Creepy Luckster gave the command to kill Pink-Haired Landshark. As for I CAN SEE THE FUTURE however...

Well, after talking things out, the only conclusion that could be reached was that Pink-Haired Landshark had to have killed him. They were both infected by that point, so it may have had something to do with the diseases they received. Unfortunately, with how fuzzy everyone's memories are for the period they were infected, it's tough to say for sure.

On the plus side, All Tits comes back after the trial! As a robot!

What?

Chapter 4

Yeah, this is probably the least changed chapter of the bunch. It's just the House of Fun, but SHIIITTTT!!! kills Furry. That's about it.

We'll keep the summary brief. New island, roller coaster, house of fun, starvation motive. Furry plays the deadly game, tries to kill All Tits the robot to resolve the situation, but gets stopped by SHIIITTTT!!!. He hadn't been able to sleep, so he'd gone for a walk through both buildings, only to find Furry dragging the sleep mode All Tits toward the elevator when he reached the other house. Without his own power down button, Furry had no chance to stop him.

The Creepy Luckster plays the Deadly Game on max difficulty during the investigation, and figures out many things that help determine the plan Furry had originally come up with. It also makes him start behaving more coldly towards the others. Hopefully that won't result in a trial later.

SHIIITTTT!!! is revealed in the trial, and the group is finally allowed to return to their cottages.

Chapter 5

Now that the group size had decreased dramatically, talk about the traitor among them had become harder to avoid. Nobody wanted to consider the possibility that one of them was misleading the group, but it was certainly at the back of everyone's minds.

The prevailing theory was that it had to be one of the Lucksters, as that would explain the impossible doubling of their talent.

With The Creepy Luckster's off-behavior starting from the end of the last case, it was hard not to assume he was the one. Also, The Creepy Luckster has always been a creepy bastard, so it was just far more pleasant a theory than any other.

After the final island opened up, he proved quite elusive however. Maybe it was just luck, but he managed to avoid the group for multiple days in a row.

And then, three days after the new island was discovered, the strangest announcement of the entire game broadcasted.

"A body has... NOT been discovered! Or, a body CAN'T be discovered! Jeez, that ruins this whole announcement, doesn't it? Oh well, the point still stands. A trial will be held in a few hours to uncover the mystery of the disappearing Ultimate."

Everyone still there, including the evasive The Creepy Luckster, met up in the restaurant. After taking stock of everyone, it was clear that Cock'n Cookin' was the person being referenced in the announcement.

Before they can start the investigation, The Creepy Luckster offered a proposition to the group. He figured out the password to enter the landlocked ship on the second island. Once they made it in there, they wouldn't have to worry about the trial at all.

Once inside the ship, things get... weird.

The group is completely scattered, sent all throughout the vessel. Direction doesn't seem to mean anything, and there's little rhyme or reason between how rooms connect. Reality itself seemed to distort within this space.

And unfortunately, if they wanted to avoid the trial, it seemed they had failed. An announcement played throughout the ship the moment everyone made it in.

"We're entering the finale! Aren't you guys excited? I'm excited! The rules of the final class trial are simple: You just have to answer every question I ask if you want to leave. Right now, I've got about three big ones on my mind: Number one! Where exactly are we? Number two! Why the heck are we here? Annnnnd number three! What about Cock'n!? Sorry, you haven't escaped that trial at all! I won't let you leave until you can tell me what happened to that poor little cook? Was he killed? Kidnapped? Did he fall into a food coma? Or was he just totally fine, and I was exaggerating his condition to mess with you?"

"Good news though! I've got a liiiittttllle hint for you, just to help you get started. Aren't I nice? Kandy! I know you're in there somewhere, tell them how nice I am!"

He then aimed a flashlight at the camera, crating an almost blinding white. Staring at it made all of you remember... things.

With the announcement complete, you had no other options. So you searched. It was confusing, sickening, confusing, revealing, and did I mention confusing? But, in the end, when Kansy gathered everyone to the main hall, they had all the evidence they were going to find.

The chandelier lowers, revealing it to be an elevator platform. Despite stairs clearly being right there, it seemed Kansy wanted you to ride on that.

Instead of going up though, it started going down. Deeper and deeper down...

The last moment of peace before your final trial.

Plot

Following their investigation of the ship, the six are lowered onto the deck of it. The ship, previously landlocked, was now in the middle of the ocean with no islands in sight. Kansy and Kandy are waiting for them, sharing a spot on Cock'n Cookin's podium. They guide the discussion along, Kansy asking about Cock'n's disappearance and Kandy asking about where they all were and why they were there.

The discussion begins, and it's revealed that the world they're all in is actually a virtual program. The question quickly rises what that means for the dead, and neither Kansy nor Kandy are certain. Death was never a feature of the program, so Kansy has just been moving corpses to an out of bounds area they are completely unable to return from. Kandy doesn't know if they'll be able to be recovered or not as a result.

They then work out that Cookin' may have been clipped somewhere he wasn't meant to be, and that the impetus was a murder attempt by The Creepy Luckster. When it comes to where he ended up however, they're a little confused.

Indos Appa, Kandy's father

Discussion turns to the corpses in the morgue Edgy-Colored Swordswoman found. They determine the bodies to be victims of a previous killing game, but that brings confusion as a result of Hiroki's memories. Since Hiroki remembers being on this cruise ship, and has seen bodies in the morgue that were entirely separate from the ones currently occupying that space.

The topic turns to the fact that the program they're all in was meant for rehabiliation. It doesn't take long to further realize that Kansy's presence was what spoiled the whole program, though they weren't clear as to why he was there.

With Hiroki mentioning the observers, Kandy becomes reluctant to move in that direction whereas Kansy is bursting with excitement at the thought. Freckled Photographer accuses one of the Lucksters, but Hiroki can prove his innocence with the fact that he was only brought in after everyone else had been. Kandy hints that the participant observer had modeled themselves after someone who, if not present, would have prevented the recovery of a participant. That hint is enough for Edgy-Colored Swordswoman to realize the truth. Citing her inflicted memories of seeing him dead before the game, she realizes that the observer had been the man she'd failed. Infant Gangster.

With that, they return to the topic of the morgue's corpses and Cock'n Cookin's disappearance. All Tits No Brains of all people is the one to work out that he must have played the trial once before, and escaped to the real world. Mostly, they come close enough for Kandy and Kansy to accept, as ever since they'd entered the glitchy ship they'd been forced to experience the virtual world in the much slower real time.

With that, they're ready to move on to the final vote, with a guest appearance from Kansy and Kandy's Father...

After the cast mistakenly concludes that Timothy Gaines is about to show up, Indos Appa appears. He reveals his identity, and apologizes for everything the cast has gone through.

The Creepy Luckster calls Indos a furry. Hiroki is appalled.

The vote he's prepared for them is simple. They can choose to Rewrite their traumatic memories from the Ultimate Luxury Cruise with those they've built in the virtual world, or Remain the people they were before entering, forgetting all that they've experienced in the program.

Hiroki asks what would happen if they pressed both buttons. Indos doesn't even know, because he never considered the possibility. Indos is sort of an idiot.

Indos pushes them to Rewrite, but in the end the majority of the group decides to press both buttons and see what comes from it.

What comes of it is, apparently, them keeping the memories of the virtual world and the memories of what they'd wanted to forget. They wake up with all of their memories in pods. Their real bodies don't match their virtual ones exactly. Edgy-Colored Swordswoman was missing an arm, Dancing Bitch was crippled, All Tits No Brains was chubby, Freckled Photographer were both looking a bit unkempts, and The Creepy Luckster... was totally fine. Of course he was.

Indos under arrest

They wake up just in time for an interpol sting to break in. Thankfully they weren't there for any of the players, but Indos. Apparently, Cock'n Cookin' had called the authorities on Indos after he got out.

Interpol Agent Fillmore Focals informs the others what was going on. He's shocked to see Hiroki among the group, and makes a passing comment about having to rectify a call he'd made to his mother some months ago. With that done, he has them all taken away to get inspected by their medical team.

Epliogues

  • Edgy-Colored Swordswoman and All Tits No Brain go off and live together since Edgy-Colored used to live with the deceased Infant Gangster. After a large payout from the Infant Gangster's clan however, the two have moved All Tit's whole family to an apartment complex and are using all their time and resources to hone their talents.
  • Freckled Photographer and Dancing Bitch recount their memories of the game they were in, the memories they'd recovered. Despite all of the horrors they contained, they feel like they can move on.
  • Hiroki and Cock'n Cookin' bonded over their mothers on a helicopter ride to Hiroki's home. Cock'n revealed that his own mom had apparently passed away, and shows a depth that Hiroki hadn't seen in the virtual world.
Kandy Gaines holding her father
  • The Creepy Luckster met Akira Gemini in the trial for those behind KG16, and bonded over their mutual hatred for those being tried. Akira invited him to a gathering of people with similar interests.
  • Odd Gaines has a small chat with Indos on the ship escorting him to his trial. After a brief discussion, Indos uses a favor to make Indos accept legal help from a friend of his. When they dock in Japan, he leaves to go kidnap Calcium Gaines for GG2.
  • Kandy and Kansy have a final talk in the virtual world, before Kandy is brought into the body of Kimothy Gaines by Timothy Gaines, apparently at Odd's request.

Cast

This was a one-session RP, so while a large cast was featured in the long backstory explaining all that lead up to the final session, there were only six player characters.

Player Characters

  • Hiroki Yoshimoto, the Ultimate Luckster
  • The Creepy Luckster
  • Freckled Photographer
  • Dancing Bitch
  • Edgy Colored Swordswoman
  • All Tits No Brains

Non-Player Characters

Hosts

Main Topic of the Trial

  • Cock'n Cookin'

Dead Players

Dead players are mentioned in backstories only.

  • Fellow Gamer
  • Nevermind I Guess
  • Infant Gangster
  • Max's Favorite
  • Fatty Faker
  • Pink-Haired Landshark
  • Hyper (Not The Fetish)
  • Furry Breeder (Also Not A Fetish Thing)
  • SHIIITTTT!!!

Epilogue-Only

v · t · e Killing Games
Games The Class Trial · Turnaround Archipelago · S.S. Despair · The New Millennium · Antarctic Catastrophe · Ten Little Sinners · Killing Bonds · Space Station Shenanigans · A Single Strand · The Tangled Souls · Deadly Joyride · Killing Game 10 Redux · The Icarus Incident · All Aboard! · Archibald's Last Lingering Nightmare · One Chance · Vincent's Paradise · February, Month of Honor · Kansy's Game · Dangan Dumbasses · Killing Game 18
Topics Esper (ESPocalypse) · Icarus incident · Nightworms · Sinsu · Ultimates initiative
Mascots · Timeline · Universe
Related Gate of Dragons: Sanguine Trails · Nightmares: A Small Hamlet · Nightmares 2 · Summerset Camp
Haynes Games · Hell is Suite (series) · Gaines Games